Resurrected.

•February 14, 2017 • 5 Comments

Hello everyone. It’s been nearly three years since I killed off O. M. Grey, but I will be posting on this site again. For the past few years I’ve been writing on my personal blog, but the need to find new employment has made it impossible to vent, process, and write about such highly personal things on there anymore.

Although this is the first day I returned to write on this site, I will populate this blog with articles from my personal site and set them on the day they were originally posted. Some posts will appear on both blogs. Sometimes I will refer to myself here using my real name rather than Olivia (O. M.) Grey, but I’m sure you’re all smart enough to follow along.

The Grey Ghost has returned, and she’s got a lot to say.

RIP OMG

•August 1, 2014 • 13 Comments

20140801-144239-52959577.jpgO. M. Grey is dead.

Well. Not really.

Okay. I admit. That was a little overdramatic, but then…consider the source.

The woman behind O. M. Grey is very alive, indeed, but this post officially marks the end of actively promoting and engaging under this pen name. It’s not a decision I make lightly. I’ve been vacillating over this for a few months now, for the following reasons herein, but it’s finally time to execute OMG and make her “The Grey Ghost” for real.

Two weeks ago, before traveling to London, I sat in my local Starbucks enjoying my frothy mocha just before a job interview. “Maybe I’m Amazed” came on over the speakers, and my heart stopped. I haven’t heard that song in years, it seems, and McCartney’s incredible voice shot straight into my soul.

Passion entered my ears as the velvety bittersweet taste of the mocha washed over my tongue. At that moment, I took Vonnegut’s advice and said to myself: “If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.” Continue reading ‘RIP OMG’

Resurrecting Avalon Revamped

•January 25, 2018 • 5 Comments

“Every once in a while I get the opportunity to read a piece of work that makes me think, ‘This is the one the will put this author on the map of the reading world.’ Avalon Revamped is that book for O. M. Grey. It deals with some horrific truths and should be read by every person on the planet. It is a great adventure, with serious underpinnings that elevate it into a higher realm of genre literature.” ~ C. L. Stegall, author of The Blood of Others


ARvmpd-FrontCover

Although this book was written and published back in 2013, it’s as relevant as ever in this age of #MeToo. I wrote this in the aftermath of rape and sexual assault. It was cathartic for me to write about a powerful succubus whose raison d’être was to punish sexual predators and deliver justice for their victims.

Continue reading ‘Resurrecting Avalon Revamped’

Of Course, #MeToo

•January 25, 2018 • 1 Comment
Copied from my personal blog.
Although this blog has the history of posts chronicling my experiences over the past 8 years.

The past few months have been many things.

Inspiring. Validating. Triggering. Infuriating. Gratifying.

Of course, I’m talking about the growing #MeToo and #TimesUp movements. At long, long last, survivors of sexual violence, abuse, and assault in all its forms are not only being heard, they’re being believed.

Although I’ve been moved to write about this many times, I’ve hesitated, as I’m hesitating now. Even as I type, I’m questioning whether I want to open this up again. I feel ashamed, like people are just so weary of this story…

Well. I’m weary of it, too. Exhausted, really.

A few weeks from now will be the 6th anniversary of the day my close, trusted friend raped me. He wasn’t the first, as I would come to realize in the subsequent years of recovery and loss, but his was the most violent, which ultimately made it impossible to dismiss or minimize, as I had been trained to do over a lifetime of gradually intensifying sexual violence starting when I was about 8 years old and continuing until I was 42. (See: The Boiling Frog Principle of Boundary Violation) Continue reading ‘Of Course, #MeToo’

A Violent Spectrum

•July 5, 2017 • 1 Comment


TW: sexual assault, rape, PTSD

“It’s horrible and shameful that women in 2017 still live with the constant threat of sexual assault, but it’s a reality we don’t have to accept quietly.” (Source)

A friend shared this Bored Panda article on my Facebook wall today:

Guy Left In Tears After Trying To Grope Woman, But Not Everyone Agrees She Has Right To Fight Back Like That

So many don’t understand this is *sexual assault*. I didn’t even understand that myself until about 5 years ago. We are socialized to accept such behavior as normal, and if we react at all, we’re shamed and silenced for “overreacting.”Sexual violence occurs on a spectrum, where even the slightest offense is too much. It is assault.

Continue reading ‘A Violent Spectrum’

Poem: For Just A Few Moments

•January 2, 2017 • 4 Comments

heart

For just a few moments
I captured your heart
A sweet, brief reunion
After decades apart

For just a few moments
We talked through the night
Sharing stories and thoughts
Of both darkness and light

Continue reading ‘Poem: For Just A Few Moments’

Well, Hello Me!

•April 17, 2016 • 2 Comments

Freedom! Joy! Beauty! Laughter! There I am! I’m living again!

After a ridiculously stressful time, I’ve once again found peace and joy in my own company. When my anxiety reaches dangerous heights, when I’m crying every morning, when I’m self-medicating just to make it through the day, I should know something is off; however, when I’m engulfed in the darkness or in crisis, I don’t see my situation clearly because I’m in survival mode and everything is distorted by those dark glasses. Continue reading ‘Well, Hello Me!’

My Stories. My Choice.

•April 10, 2016 • 2 Comments

annelamottquoteyouowneverythingthathappenedtoyou

My stories. My emotions. My blog. My life. My choice.

Try to silence me and watch how very loudly and clearly I will speak.

I will never, ever be silent again.

Poem: My Dangerous Heart

•April 5, 2016 • Leave a Comment

Beware! Oh, beware!
My dangerous heart
Its treachery knows no boundary
Forever alone
Forever apart
It killed the love that had found me.

True interest remains
As long as you stay
Far, far and away from it
For when you get close
It swallows you whole
Trapped in its cavernous pit.

Continue reading ‘Poem: My Dangerous Heart’

You Say You Want to Talk to Me

•March 31, 2016 • 5 Comments

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Over the past few of months I met someone for whom I felt a considerable amount of emotion. Love, actually. My readers know him as Mr. Impossible. As you read in the poem I wrote about him “The Moment You Smiled,” I hadn’t planned to stay in touch as friends, but he reached out to me wanting to know more, curious about me, my past, my work.

We started to become friends, and you can imagine I was overjoyed because I felt so much for him already. He was brilliant and kind, funny and real. He had the ability to own his shit and mistakes and apologize. He was honest and trying to be more open, something difficult for him. Above all, he was genuine. Genuine in his words, his actions, and his affection for me.

At first. Continue reading ‘You Say You Want to Talk to Me’

Old Patterns, New Perspectives

•March 27, 2016 • 2 Comments


After an emotionally draining week, the details of which I won’t go into here, things are looking up! A few days off gave me some great perspective, and I’m seeing clearly now. I’m riding my own white horse.

Despite the amount of work we do on ourselves to break free of old patterns and socialization, we still fall into those deeply carved grooves, and it takes some doing to crawl back out of them.

Well, I’ve crawled out and feel the sweet rain on my face.  Continue reading ‘Old Patterns, New Perspectives’